As a cosmic baddie, we already know youโre all about aligning with the universe, creating from your soul, and living with purpose. Whether youโre diving deep into your spiritual practices or building an empire with your creative gifts, thriving relationships are essential for your happiness and success.
World-renowned Belgian psychotherapist and relationship expert Esther Perel says โthe quality of our relationships determines the quality of our livesโ, meaning the connections we have with others provide us with a greater sense of meaning, happiness, and well-being than any other human experience.
But how do you ensure your relationships stay strong when youโre juggling cosmic alignment, creative passion, and personal growth? Here are three powerful pieces of advice I have learned or read over the years that really changed the game for me and my clients. These three hot takes will elevate your connectionsโwhether theyโre romantic, professional, or friendship.
1. “Communicate with Intent, Not Emotion” โ Esther Perel
Can you tell I have learned a lot from Esther over the years? Whether itโs my marriage to my Life Wizard, my relationship with my three little sisters or my business partnership with my work wife, Audrey, it all comes down to communication. When we communicate out of pure emotionโwhether itโs anger, frustration, or anxietyโwe tend to react rather than resolve. For cosmic baddies balancing their magic, business, and personal lives, emotions can sometimes get tangled in the mix.
The shift: Pause before reacting. Whether youโre in a heated conversation with a partner or facing a tough decision with a collaborator, ask yourself, โWhat am I truly trying to say?โ Grounding your communication in clarity and intention helps prevent unnecessary conflict and fosters deeper understanding. Calm and focused conversations lead to more harmonious connections.
2. “Turn Toward, Not Away” โ The Gottman Institute
The Gottman Institute, renowned for its research on lasting relationships, teaches the importance of what they call โbids for connection.โ These are small moments when your partner or friend seeks your attention, affection, or support. The key to thriving relationships is responding to these bids by โturning towardโ them rather than turning away. In the busy world of a cosmic changemaker, I get it, itโs easy to miss these subtle cuesโbut over time, consistently turning away can weaken your bond.
The shift: Make it a point to notice and respond to these moments, whether theyโre as simple as a partner asking how your day went or a friend needing a quick pep talk. Even small gestures like eye contact, a smile, or showing interest in their thoughts strengthen your emotional connection. By turning toward these bids, youโre building trust and intimacy, which form the foundation of strong, lasting relationships.
3. “Relationships are a dance- sometimes you are close, sometimes you are far away. What matters is that you maintain eye contact and your rhythm.โ – Unknown
I seriously have no idea where I heard this- maybe it was my spirit guides? Either way this is a metaphor that has really helped me because the truth of the matter is none of your relationships are going to stay the same all the time. People grow, we get busy, we have moments where we are so close- dancing cheek to cheek if you will- and other times we need a little space and fresh air to expand and evolve. Like Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers, sometimes we are further apart- dancing together but separate.
However, what helps Freddy and Ginger rejoin seamlessly is a strong visual connection. Meaning, itโs okay if you, your best friend or romantic partner is entering a busier season as long as you continue to actively work to โseeโ each other.
In ANY significant long-term, relationship, there will be periods of flourishing connection, times of quiet stillness, and moments of challenge and change. As a cosmic baddie, trusting the natural flow of your relationships is key to allowing them to evolve. Itโs easy to get anxious during the “steps apart momentโ of a relationship, when things feel distant or strained, but remember that growth often happens during these quieter phases and can bring you closer than you were before.
The shift: Embrace each part of the dance for what it offers. Work on your attachment style. Prioritize mutual growth. Instead of being afraid of change, embrace it together. Regularly check in on each otherโs goals, dreams, and aspirations.
When you create space for growth in your relationships, you build a dynamic that is ever-evolving, inspiring, and deeply fulfilling. By trusting the dance, you allow relationships to evolve naturally without forcing outcomes, which creates space for deeper intimacy and understanding.
Final Thoughts
As a cosmic baddie, youโre already living a life full of intention, creativity, and alignment with your highest self. By integrating these expert insights into your relationships, youโll create deeper connections that support both your personal and professional glow-up.
What relationship advice has helped you thrive? Share your thoughts in the comments below!