Here’s the truth: we have never needed heart-centered, sensitive, empathic humans in leadership more than we do right now. 

And when I say “leadership,” I’m not only speaking to the CEOs, corporate leaders, or baddies with a big social media following. I’m talking to the mamas, the teachers, the healers, the service providers, the nurses. The women & space holders who are the backbone of our society. This one’s for you. 

So you have a vision. An impact you know you’re meant to have on the world. 

Maybe you’ve committed your life’s work to the practice of Reiki, here to bring more light to the planet through energetic healing. Maybe you’re an artist, who’s devoted to helping others express themselves more authentically while filling the world with more beauty and color. 

Your vision, and your ability to walk it out, depend on you feeling energetically resourced, clear, and connected. 

Empath Boundaries: What They Are And Why You Need Them

As an empath or highly sensitive person, your energy field is receptive and open. Have you ever noticed that random strangers at the grocery store or hair salon love opening up to you about their personal lives? That’s because of you, bb. 

You’ve just got this way about you. Your aura attracts vulnerability in others, because people can sense that their stories are safe with you. 

You have a gift for listening and holding space. However, when this gift goes unchecked, without boundaries, mindful self-care, and energetic protection practices, it can quickly become a drain on you and your life force. 

Empath boundaries are the toolkit of personal standards, rules, and practices that help you to stay open, loving, and receptive without taking on the emotions or experiences of other people. 

Just like therapists need therapists, empaths need empath boundaries. 

Think about it like this. When you’re listening to a loved one who’s going through a period of heightened emotion—good or bad—you’re so in it with them. Their pain is your pain, their joy is your joy. And this ability to empathize, relate, and connect is truly one of the most magical qualities of the human experience. 

But imagine finishing a phone conversation after a long, intense vent sesh with your bestie… and never actually hanging up the phone. The line is open—you have an ear to the rest of their day, their interactions, conversations with their partner… This energy lingers with you. And your energy lingers with them. 

Empath boundaries and energetic hygiene practices help you hang up the phone. 

You’re able to stay in your power and agency. You love and lead with an open heart, knowing that if ever you feel drained from holding space for others, you have practices, routines, and support to fall back on, to get you back to full capacity. 

This allows you to stay in the work you love and the service you live for, sustainably, so that you can make a remarkable, lasting impact on the world. And god, do we need that! 

Here are a few simple energetic hygiene practices and empath boundaries to help you stay in your power and lead from the heart:  

#1: Saying No & Honoring Your Limits

“Traditional” boundaries can be empath boundaries too! When you can sense you’re at your limit and your container is full, honor your sacred no. Choosing not to take on that project, last-minute client session, or phone call when you’re low on bandwidth is the highest act of service you can offer. 

Want to learn more about boundaries and how to set them? Check out our article, ‘The Power of Boundaries: A Revolutionary Guide.’

#2: Grounding Your Energy

We each have an energy body, or aura, that needs loving care—just like our physical bodies.As empaths and intuitives, we have a strong connection to our emotional world and to other dimensions and layers of the spiritual world. It’s vital for your physical, emotional, and energetic health to practice grounding your own energy on a regular basis. 

If you can get out in nature, or even that little patch of grass outside your apartment, putting your bare feet on the ground and visualizing your connection to the earth can be wildly effective at grounding your system when you feel untethered. 

Before each and every client session, reading, or coaching call, I ground and run my energy. I visualize my grounding cord at the base of my spine or the bottoms of my feet, and imagine it dropping down through all the layers of the earth, all the way to the earth’s core. I feel that connection, the grounding earth energy rising back up to meet me, and know that I’m locked in and tethered. This has made a WORLD of difference in my own life, and also for my clients. 

P.S. – I have a free grounding meditation on my podcast, Say More. Listen here! 

#3: Nervous System Regulation & Somatic Processing

As a highly sensitive human, you also have a highly sensitive nervous system! Nervous system regulation refers to practices and techniques that help maintain or restore balance between your Parasympathetic Nervous System (“rest and digest”) and your Sympathetic Nervous System (“fight or flight”). 

Somatic processing is a therapeutic approach that focuses on the connection between the mind and body, particularly how the body stores and expresses trauma, emotions, and stress. 

Grounding, mentioned above, can be a somatic regulation tool. Through awareness, practice, and education, you’ll notice how your body holds onto different emotions and experiences. Some of my favorite teachers and practitioners of somatic and body-based healing are Madison of Radiant Somatics, and Shantani Moore, who is a Spinal Energetics Practitioner. 

#4: Energetic Sorting, AKA, “Is this mine?” 

Get in the habit of asking yourself, “Is this feeling, thought, or emotion mine?” Through practice and discernment, you’ll be able to identify when you’re feeling your own feelings, or someone else’s. When you’re in a group space or experiencing the energies of a lot of people at once, this tool is going to help you so much. 

#5: Clearing Your Energy Field

Create a ritual and routine out of cleansing and clearing your energetic field. You can do this through movement, like “sweeping” the energy off your physical body or third eye with your hands; through visualization, imagining the energetic cord between you and another person or situation being cut or retracted back to you; sound, by humming or clapping to clear old/other energy; or by working with clearing crystals like selenite. 

Your job as an empath is to be a mirror, not a sponge. Taking on others’ emotions doesn’t help them heal, and it can be detrimental to your own well-being, too. Find what works for you and stick to it! And if you feel like “nothing is happening,” that’s okay. Your intention is what matters most.  

To learn more about energetic protection, check out our article, ‘Energy Protection 101.’

#6: Opening & Closing the Sacred Container

Especially when doing spiritual, intuitive, or group healing work, it’s so important to open your sacred space and then close it, when you’re finished. Opening your space is the process of “picking up the phone.” Perhaps you speak (or think in your mind) an invocation to call in your highest healing guides, angels, or benevolent ancestors, declaring your space is now open. Maybe you’re a healer or intuitive and you imagine calling in your client or patient’s guides or higher self (with consent). 

To close the container, I’ll often say out loud, “This container is now closed. Thank you, guides!” or, “I’m hanging up now,” paired with a sweeping motion in front of my body as if I’m physically shutting the container down. Don’t forget to hang up the phone! 

#7: Asking for Guidance & Receiving Support

Whether you’re seeking the mentorship of a trusted coach or advisor, calling a friend to cry it out, or calling on your spirit guides to hold you in times of uncertainty, it’s true that the best way to receive guidance and support is to ask for it. It’s not up to you to have it together all of the time. Practice surrendering control, be open to answers and miracles, and remember you’re never alone. 

#8: Prioritizing Pleasure

Choose joy! Prioritizing your pleasure and enjoyment, laughter, orgasms, the things that light you up, is perhaps the most effective way to increase your capacity and expand your impact. Centering pleasure in a world that has conditioned us to hustle and grind is the ultimate act of rebellion. 

These are revolutionary times we’re living in, baddies! I hope these tools help you feel more empowered, regulated, and supported in loving and leading from the heart center. 

Empath boundaries and energy protection are some of my favorite topics to teach on! Connect with me on Instagram @byaudreywhelan and let me know which of these tips resonates with you the most.